I have a question for you.
How much are you loving yourself at the moment?
I’ve talked to a lot of women this week, between client calls, chats with my girlfriends (and if I’m being fully transparent) with myself.
I am hearing a lot of women hating on themselves for not being “good enough”, “successful enough” or not “doing enough”.
Enough is enough! You’ve got to put an end to this negative self talk!
Things/life/relationships/work are challenging as it is, then you have to beat up on yourself too?
No bueno, my friend!
I know it sounds easier to say that to do, but it’s definitely a muscle that you can build and strengthen over time.
You’ve got to practice self-love and self-compassion, otherwise you are finished before you’ve even started.
One of my clients was having one of those negative days where she felt totally “less than”. So we coached around her limiting beliefs and mindset to really get to the root of the issue.
Once we were able to get to the root issue, we were able to pluck that pesky root out and get rid of it.
That’s not to say that it won’t “grow” back, but when it does it will be weaker and smaller (kind of like your body hair after you’ve been waxing for some time….)
Below are some of the tips that I gave to my client so that she could get her self-love strength back. I hope you’ll try them out when you are having one of those not-so-pleasant days.Choose a few things to do where you feel most full of joy, pleasure or love and then DO THEM!
- Grab your journal and a cup of your favorite drink and write out all of the ways that you’re amazing. Give yourself some major literary lovin’. Write down all of the things that you are doing really well, your accomplishments, the compliments that you’ve recently received, or anything else that makes you feel good.
- Talk it out with someone you trust. Have a heart-to-heart chat with your girlfriends, partner or coach (hey, that’s me!) and tell them what you are feeling. They will be able to lovingly guide you to the brighter side because they are able to hold a bigger vision for you than you can hold for yourself. It’s an amazing feeling when you share with someone and they basically tell you “Girl, you’ve SO got this!”
- Try “grounding” exercises. One of my personal faves is taking my shoes off and feeling the grass beneath my feet and connecting with the earth. Or if going out in the grass is not an option, stand and envision yourself as a tree and that your feet are rooting into the earth’s core. (I know it sounds weird and woo-woo, but don’t knock it ’til you’ve tried it.)
Get off the self-hate train and do whatever it is that makes your heart sing. Maybe you enjoy walking your dog in the sunshine, or knitting.
Whatever it is, make sure you do it for at least an hour. Other stuff can wait.You are the priority here. If your cup is not full, then you’ve got nothing to give to others (or your work).
I’d love to hear from you about this subject and if you’ve tried any of the exercises and how they worked for you.